Urban Dictionary Tees

tl;dr: Literally, "Too long; didn't read" Said whenever a nerd makes a post that is too long to bother reading.

knockin' over tables: The act of hitting on women while intoxicated. Sometimes, when drunkenly talking to a woman and resting your arm on her table, the table will get knocked over.

farmer snort: Plugging one nostril by placing the index finger on it while blowing out the other one in order to discharge nasal mucus on the ground. The "farmer snort" is a quick, efficient way to blow your nose. Unfortunately, it's also a quick, efficient way to guarantee you won't get a second date either.

Chevrolegs: The kind of vehicle you own when you can't afford a car. Your feet.

icescapee: The ice cube that ends up on the floor when you break a new tray of ice.

note to self: 1. an exclamation used when you want to punctuate/emphasize an obvious or insulting quip or action 2. an exclamation highlighting something you did not know until then 3. a personal reminder

juice: Respect and credability on the street. AKA. Sauce

OCT: An acronym for On Company Time.

your mom: an abstract concept loosely affiliated with notions of the intended audience's maternal figure. normally expressed as an intended slight on said maternal figure. often serves as indication of the end of a conversation.

to ripcord: verb. To flee from an awkard situation or boring lecture. Usually involves crossing in front of others or in some other way disturbing the peace and making an ass of onesself.

military factor: The factor by which a male's hottness increases when he's in his uniform. On a scale of one to ten, a uniform usually increases a guy's number by 2. Can also be applied to non-military men in some uniforms.

Spanglish: Urban American language. Not quite English, Not quite Spanish

spim: An online advertising solicitation sent via an Instant Messenger program, usually containing a link to a website featuring services such as pornography, credit repair, or prescription drug sales. Like spam, these communications are often sent under the guise of being a message from a friend. The links enclosed may also be used to spread viruses.

search engine: Shamelessly endorses other websites by letting people add their sites to a great big list of sites.

ball buster: 1) A woman (also affectionately called a bitch) who challenges the virility and dominance of a man by utilizing verbal abuse and/or by controlling social situations usually controlled by the men. 2) A woman who is so bitchin' and intelligent that most men fear openning their mouth in her presence, much less making a sexual advance.

Sxc: Sexy. Used as an internet shortcut.

Earth: God's reality TV show.

tiger: 1. Tiger is a word said condescendingly by someone at least 1 year older than someone else, often but not exclusively by a retiree to a teenager. It makes fun of the younger person's energetic, unlearned, immature, vicious, aggresive, dynamic persona. 2. A good friend. 3. An Acquaintance.

sucka free: 1) Finally kicking a POS boyfriend to the curb after a long and crappy relationship. Usually to the relief of all friends and family. 2) Single Status Female

ehaircut: see ihaircut. When a person changes their online identity in some way.

drama trap: A scheme engineered by one who is a lover of drama to suck a victim into a situation or succession of events in real life having the dramatic progression or emotional effect characteristic of a play.

television: The early 21st century drug of choice. A shared illusion, making its addicts think they have friends, a life, access to good information, and the critical thinking skills to form valid opinions. Fatal in large doses.

DYJGTIY: Did you just get the internet yesterday

Party Promise: Party promises are those "plans" you make at the end of social gatherings where one, if not both, promisers never actually intend on following through.

outside: It's uncomfortable and there's this big hot thing in the sky and there are other people that you sometimes have to talk to.

body spam: Unsolicited physical contact.

couchlock: n. being too stoned to get off of the couch see: couchlocky

hurt locker: noun. A figurative place where someone is said to be or will be, if they are getting or expect to be getting hurt or beaten.