Urban Dictionary Hoodies

girlfriend tax: The amount of fries taken by your female significant other, after you've already asked her if she was hungry but she insisted she didn't want anything.

dickheading: Taking a dick pick angling the camera up towards ones face, covering your head with your dick head. Resulting in an image of a dick with arms.

pundint: A common misspelling of the word "pundit," usually made by people with a fourth-grade education.

AM BM: Morning (AM) bowel movement (BM). The first poop of the day, almost always taken immediately upon awakening in the morning. A "beer dump" is a type of AM BM, but not all AM BMs are beer dumps.

on my mama: honest to god, I swear on my mother!

emoji illiterate: Someone who doesn't know how to read an emoji.

boy smell: Boys smell like basic laundry detergent, plain soap, a little bit of protein powder, and fresh rubber.

spwl: text talk acronym standing for 'stroking penis while laughing'

Adulting: Adulting (v): to do grown up things and hold responsibilities such as, a 9-5 job, a mortgage/rent, a car payment, or anything else that makes one think of grown ups.

Ivaginary Friend: An imaginary female that a male lies about having sex with.

Burritoing: Burritoing (Verb) - The act of wrapping yourself in multiple blankets, nearing, but not reaching, the point of suffocation.

coolin: another word for chillin. hanging out in the house doing you.

boob cuddle: When one rests their head on breast while cuddling. Fondling may or may not happen.

Dusty balls: A hood term used to describe when a man has not had sexual intercourse for a prolonged period of time.

deadbeat kids: Having children that just aren't worth supporting

wedmate: In the wake of the recent legalization of LGBT marriage in the U.S. , this gender-neutral noun refers to a person about to get married very soon or recently did so, for either LGBTQ or straight people. (synonyms: bride, groom).

get your balls wet: The phrase get your balls wet is intended to indicate that one must go balls deep or balls out giving one's activity 100% effort

emotional whore: A person who shares the most intimate details of their life/heartbreak/feelings with strangers because it's cheaper than mental healthcare, and not subject to the same bias or advice that the person could receive from someone closer to the situation.

dirty dick hands: When a guy finishes using a urinal and, zero fucks given, exits the bathroom without washing his hands. Abbreviation: DDH

Finna yack: When in absolute disgust one says "finna yack" meaning, I'm going to puke. Could also express disagreement or physical illness.

:3: It's supposed to be a coy internet smiley face, resembling something like a cat, cuteness in nature. I personally think it looks like a ballsack mouth.

flexitarian: An occasional meat eater. Not a vegetarian, maybe not even intentionally avoiding meat.

Ganic: Short for organic meaning better than fresh. Also means extremely cool or dope.

battery operated boyfriend (bob): A vibrator or sometimes a dildo. For when you don't have a steady male companion and/or when he can't get you off.

Colon Crockpot: When your large intestine has been holding back waste for more than 48 hours and your farts are the leading indicator of what is to come.

Baby sauce: Cum, semen whatever you call it when you nut

Intense Fuckery: When you are tired/bored and sober, and fuck around too much and end up doing something you will regret

Fancy Bitch: A classy, elegant, self-sufficient woman who carries herself with dignity and pride and takes no shit from any bitch, male or female.