Urban Dictionary Mugs

bridesmaid wasted: The special kind of drunk you only get as a female member of a wedding party. The kind where you wake up the next day in a pretty dress, missing your shoes, smeared with someone else's lipstick and unable to remember how you made it home after a wedding or stagette.

you got to be fist fucking me: When someone does something really stupid.

Netflix Bipolar: When you can't choose what to watch on Netflix so you keep switching from thing to thing

one reply bitch: A one reply bitch is someone who replies with simple words like: "yeah, okay, cool, nice, alright, yep, whatever, nope," etc

lackoass: adj., A person who has a limited posterior. One who cannot fill out a pair of jeans.

post fartum depression: The sense of let down after your cat, dog, or spouse does not recognize your fart with as much enthusiasm as you were feeling it deserved.

Pray punt: To offer prayer as a concrete solution to a problem. To, literally, run the issue "up the ladder" and wait for God to figure it out, thereby relieving you of taking any real action.

you already know: The correct response to the question "what it is".

Sansplants: A lack of breast implants. Real boobs. Titties with no silicone or saline.

later ago: Something that happened earlier.

Office Hit List: A list of people with whom you work and whom you would also like to murder. But you never would because you're not a murderer so it's an "office hit list" instead of just a regular hit list.

say wussup: The act of attempting to court a shortie with the desire to acquire booty.

Instagram Prime Time: from 5 to 8 PM the time of day during which Instagram will be the most active; for example the Instagram feed will be quickly updated and Instagram pictures will receive more instantaneous likes.

Barithmetic: The math a younger girl does when she meets an older guy in a bar, where she finds how old she was when you were her age.

Driver's License Weight: The weight a person reports on his or her driver's license which is anywhere between 5 and 20 lbs. less than the person's actual weight.

Where they do that at: A more ghetto way of "Who does that?" when in a moment of surprise at someones actions

bathroom buckshot: The act of having explosive diarrhea in close proximity to a toilet which results in fecal matter splatter on said toilet and nearby areas. Fecal matter splatter resembles the pattern of buckshot or birdshot. Usually associated with Radar Ass or Radar Butt. Antonym: Immaculate Defecation

Living in sin with a safety pin: To have a child out of wedlock.

thirst trapping: The act of looking very attractive to the opposing gender to lead them on to rejection

fling cleaning: (n.) when a bro cleans his room solely because he thinks he might be getting laid that night.

Accidental Incest: Having a realistic wet dream to wake up to hearing your parents having sex in the other room.

wombmates: A pair of twins that subsequently go on to live as roommates.

Costcop: the Costco worker who checks your receipt as you leave

go down on: To go down on a woman is to start her off with nice, long, passionate kisses on the lips, and then down to her neck, and then down to her breasts where you have your pleasure with them, and then you kiss your way across her tummy, and finally, you have ultimate pleasure with orally pleasing her pussy.

compulsive highlighter: A person who, when reading text on a computer screen, cannot help but constantly select, deselect, and reselect the text. This highlighting ranges from constantly clicking the text at random, highlighting the words as they are read, or highlighting the words as a bookmark to stay on track.

nexterday: The day after tomorrow

Easter Bunny: An exceptionally large lagomorph that died for our sins (or was that wordJesus/word?) and, during the month of April, delivers delectable candy treats to all the good little Gentile boys and girls of the world.

selfie stick: 1. a selfie stick 2. slang for one's own johnson